Wait patiently for the Lord.
Be brave and courageous.
Yes, wait patiently for the Lord.
Psalm 27:14

as i sit and wait
i am reminded
of the one constant in my life.
God's love..
as i float and sway as humans do
God's love remains the same.

“Indeed, if we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that Our Lord finds our desires, not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”
- C.S Lewis, Weight of Glory

i seem to be reminded of this fact everywhere i turn
and it really has been on my mind for days..
God's love is constant.
meditate on that.

... i think i have viral pink eye.
the issues never end with me :)
and i sort of can't sleep.

its been a eventful night.
sorrow, heartache, joy, and even laughter.
the purpose of something is not always easily seen
but doesn't mean it doesn't exist....
or that it is not powerful.
I trust in God's purpose and His way..
even when I can't see, even when i can't see.

I have an overwhelming sense of freedom and love.
God's love is so indescribable and magnificent.
it washes over me like a healing wave of cool water
it washes away my selfishness, my desire to control,
my pride, and all my other luxuries I hold on to..
God's love covers sin.
s u r r e n d e r . . .
what a amazing Father I serve..
my heart screams, thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

we all go through valleys
and climb mountains
i'm so thankful for the people God has given us
and the spirit of Truth he puts in our hearts and souls..
to help us through it all..
He never leaves me or forsakes me.
how can it be, how can it be?


in other news..
i just bought a "new" but used camera
... you have no idea how excited i am !!!
its my christmas present from my grandfather
its a cannon rebel 300D. 6.3 mega pixels.
it was such a good price, and being that it was used
it was the only one available..
if you know me at all, you know i love taking pictures
and capture the joys of life, people, and everything else
I've been wanting a "new" camera for awhile now
so, this year seemed to be the year to do that.
my old one has bright green gaft tape keeping the battery intact
and lets just say it has seen better days, better days indeed.

seasons are changing.
so am i.

"... it's time to turn the new leaves over."
-anberlin, the unwinding cable car

i'm sitting here enjoy some soup i just made
seafood chowder.. i started off using a recipe
but then i deviated and made my own creation
it is so good, i wish i had someone to share it with.

".. it's like a book elegantly bond, but in a language that you can't read just yet."
Death Cab for Cutie, I will possess your heart

i got a new cell phone today
i love gifts, esp things from the heart.
.. i was very excited to open my "new" used cell phone.
i've had issues with every cell phone i've had for like the last 4 or so months
hopefully this will be the last of those "fits" for awhile.
i really like it so far... so hopefully that continues.

8 months until i graduate, hopefully.
8 months to find a job, a place to live, but more importantly
to know where God wants me.
i want to find myself exactly where he wants me
he knows my heart, my desires, and he knows what is best
as much as i want to plan and worry ...
I know it is best to rest in Him, and His words.
I want to be where my Father wants me..
so, I will continue to wait on Him...

"... be still and know that I am God"
Psalms 46:10

i cannot tell you how much i hate liars.
i hate them.
being honest is very important to me.

Truthful witness by a good person clears the air, but liars lay down a smoke screen of deceit.
Proverbs 12:17

God can't stomach liars; he loves the company of those who keep their word.
Proverbs 12:22

my current situation however i'm unsure of what to do
lying makes me angry...
and it also makes me wonder what else are you lying to me about?
why are you lying to me? why??

If you reason with an arrogant cynic, you'll get slapped in the face; confront bad behavior and get a kick in the shins. So don't waste your time on a scoffer; all you'll get for your pains is abuse. But if you correct those who care about life, that's different—they'll love you for it! Save your breath for the wise—they'll be wiser for it; tell good people what you know—they'll profit from it. Skilled living gets its start in the Fear-of-God, insight into life from knowing a Holy God. It's through me, Lady Wisdom, that your life deepens, and the years of your life ripen. Live wisely and wisdom will permeate your life; mock life and life will mock you.
proverbs 9:7

Truth lasts; lies are here today, gone tomorrow.
proverbs 12:19

despite what I want to do... and my emotions tell me do
i know that it's probably not wisdom.

typically my room stays pretty organized
but once and while it goes all chaotic.
that is def one of those times.

i was up super later last night doing homework
way too late.
& then woke up feeling really awful.
my ear aches, my cheeks ache, and i'm just miserable.
i took a nap when i got home from class
so at least i'm feeling a little bit better now.
and thankfully tomorrow i don't have any classes
lots of work to do though..
at least i won't have to leave my jammies to do it.

friday i have a presentation on canada.
oh canada, canada.
i feel like i know the country better than my partner
i've spent more time there and have lots of friends there too
i'm not even sure he's even ever been there!
however most people have never been to their countries
so i guess i've got a leg up on that.

oh dear. lately i've been realizing
that i have a lot more of a story..
i've done a lot more than most people
my age.. that is pretty amazing.
the other day in class someone asked a question

about housing - in PA is illegal to have more than 8 girls
in one house, its considered a brothel.
in texas there is no law onn the books
because i lived with 13 girls in one house (not a brothel!)
so, my professor got a kick out of the fact i knew this fact
and that i lived with 13 other girls - not in a brothel
he started teasing me, and i get embarrassed really easily.
so then my face turned purple, and then he made fun of me again.
haha. anyway - it made me think, if he only knew my story.
if he only knew..

i'm thankful, so thankful for my adventures
and hopefully more to come..